Streetgeezer sailed through the underpass under the Harrow Road Junction. His passenger had made the fatal mistake of commenting on his woolly hat.
'I don't know, you look in the mirror and you see Robert de Niro in Meanstreets, Charles Bronson in Death Wish, or any number of Bruce Willis, Chuck Norris, or Sylvester Stallone films. You feel like a special forces commando on a "do or die" mission, but you are told you look like a half-wit gardener from a sixties soap opera, BENNY. Huh do me a favour!' It was not his natural inclination to use lines like 'Do me a favour', but you did yourself NO favours by making the punter suspect that you might be smart enough to be TAKING the piss even if it is being unwittingly offered.

'There's no ashtray in the back. I'll have to use the window.' The passenger observed. Streetgeezer allowed smoking, being an ex-smoker he sympathised with those addicted, but he resented not being consulted before having to suffer the passengers' fumes.
'Yes, use the world as your ashtray.' He replied tartly.
'Well cigarettes are degradable.' The passenger countered defensively.
'Yes I agree,..cigarettes DO degrade.'

To Acton